The holiday season is a time of joy, connection, and cherished traditions. For my family, it has also been a time to reunite with loved ones who’ve been away. This year, my college kid decided to only come home for a week, instead of the entire 3-4 week she has for winter break. If you are in the same boat and your college-aged child is only coming home for a week at Christmas instead of the entire winter break, you may feel a similar mix of emotions—excitement, anticipation, and maybe even a hint of sadness. Here’s how I am hoping to make the most of her short stay while creating lasting memories.
1. Focus on Quality Time
When your child’s visit is brief, it’s tempting to cram as much as possible into their schedule. This year, I decided to take extra days off from work and focus on quality over quantity. I am setting aside time for family dinners, game nights, or simply sitting together watching Home Alone and decorating the Christmas tree! Sometimes, the simplest moments are the most meaningful.
2. Prioritize Traditions
Think about the holiday traditions that mean the most to your family and prioritize those. We are continuing our tradition of ice skating on Christmas Eve and followed by church, Chinese food Christmas night for dinner, looking at lights in area neighborhoods, and lots of holiday movies!
3. Respect Their (and Your) Need for Rest
College life is demanding, and winter break is often one of the few times students can truly unwind. My daughter arrived home after week of fun with friends after finals, but is my child still arrived home looking forward to sleeping in and relaxing. While it’s natural to want to make every moment count, respecting their need for downtime can help them feel recharged and appreciated. And, don’t forget giving yourself some downtime in the middle of all the creating of memories!
4. Plan for One-on-One Time
Amid family gatherings and holiday festivities, it’s easy to lose sight of individual connections. Carve out some one-on-one time to catch up with your college kid. Whether it’s a coffee date, a walk in the park, or a heart-to-heart chat at home, these moments can help you reconnect on a deeper level. For me, most of our time is one-on-one and my daughter has been very thoughtful and intentional about making time for time with me!
5. Embrace Flexibility
Your child’s week at home may also include plans with friends or other commitments. As I type this, my daughter is catching up with a high school friend in the living room. While it can be hard to share their time, embracing flexibility will make the visit more enjoyable for everyone. Encourage them to balance their time between family and friends while still making the most of your moments together. For me, I love hearing her laugh and catch up, and seeing these other young people that I watched grow up in high school.
6. Send Them Off with Love (and Snacks!)
As the week comes to an end, it’s natural to feel a pang of sadness. Channel those emotions into sending them off with care packages, snacks, or handwritten notes to remind them of home. A small token of your love can help them feel connected, even when they’re miles away.
7. Reflect on the Big Picture
While a week may feel too short, remember that the bond you’ve built with your child transcends any one holiday season. Celebrate the time you do have together and cherish the fact that they chose to come home, even for a little while.
Having your college kid home for just a week at Christmas can be bittersweet, but it’s also an opportunity to focus on what truly matters: being together. With a little planning and a lot of love, you can make this holiday season one to remember. I love how our relationship has grown, and these short visits mean so much more.
Read here about how I dealt with not having my college kid home for Thanksgiving: A New Kind of Thanksgiving
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